Hughie Lawrence - How Deep Is Your Love?

There are some things that I’m really surprised about concerning this blog. One of them is that I’ve only mentioned Hughie Lawrence once before. I struggle to believe that in all that I’ve written in well over 500 posts I’ve only mentioned him once when he’s been fairly pivotal to the Christopher Dryden Story over the last 10 years at least. Not that he’d mind I’m sure. He’s not really one to draw attention to himself as in look to get people to think of him. He’s relatively self-deprecating in that sense (key word – relatively), but that shouldn’t stop me from writing about the guy.

Sure the last time I did write about the guy it was a fulsome blog of thanks for all the good that he has done for me, but he still has continued to be quite a force in my life. Indeed over the last year or so he has been the source of much of my personal issues. What has remained outstanding about this guy is that he really gets me thinking about that question the Bee Gees asked – How Deep Is Your Love?

The other day, Hughie paid me one of the highest compliments I’ve heard another human being give me – and that includes my wife (probably … oh hold on she’s reminding me who holds the purse strings, so I’ll retract that immediately). He mentioned that I’ve been one of the greatest blessings in his life. Now I’m not usually good with compliments anyway, but it took all the 18-year home training at dead-pan poses to maintain an unruffled outer visage at that. Inside, meanwhile, I was in turmoil as I’ve never really seen myself that way … at all.

Then I got thinking. You see Hughie isn’t a Machiavellian author of spin and manipulation, but he’s no slouch when it comes to saying something multi-layered either. So in a real sense I can see where he’s coming from, because from my perspective I can see where I’ve blessed him in developing a closer walk with Christ. We’ve been working particularly closely together for almost 10 years now and in that time I have continued to be a pain for one reason or another. Whether it was the level of immaturity and inconsistency in the first few years, or the inevitable challenges of the changes that come after married life in the middle years or the restless growing pain issues of recent years, I have stuck around to be a persistent thorn in his side. In all my errors he has on most occasions channelled the love of Christ in dealing with me and that’s definitely not been about the arm round the shoulder bit, but saying the right words or giving space where needed.

I know for sure that I’ve changed in that ten years and without exercising false humility I can recognise areas of growth. Despite being his underling and junior brother, I can say that I have likewise seen changes in him as a man, leader and brother. When I first came across him he was very much predisposed to being a closed book rarely willing to give up a point of view or concede a position he held. I definitely knew that he was unlikely to reveal much about himself. Yet especially recently perhaps over the last year or so, he has been more vulnerable and transparent with his church family. He has let people into his inner sanctum to some extent and opened up about the challenges and his need for prayer and help in general. That level of openness is immediately encouraging and sometimes I’ve felt he’s almost preached as if he’s about to die.

His commitment to the Kingdom and what he believes God is telling him has pushed him harder than ever before as he believes God for things that would make a lesser man withdraw with haste. He is still one of the most charismatic communicators I’ve seen in action and his failings only reinforce his openness to the leading of the Lord. His leadership qualities are evident in the achievements he has led others to bring about. He still manages to get people to do things they don’t want to do to help them discover what God has for them. He has faith that helps people move beyond their previous position to a closer one with God.

Things are changing between Hughie and I as they must as people get older and things change. Things are changing here in Stoke-on-Trent and we must change with them. That change, as I’m learning, does not mean that the love for each other recedes. It definitely does not mean that the level of respect diminishes. On the contrary as I look back at the privilege I’ve had in witnessing this man of God in action in good times and bad over the last 10 years I recognise what an honour it is to see God at work mightily in the life of His son. That respect, that admiration and that honour for a man is burnt deep into my psyche and wherever we go and whatever changes by the grace of God that connection will remain.

Today he celebrated another birthday and I’m sure he got what he needed for it. Of far greater importance is that reward that awaits him as he remains faithful to the call God has made on his life. I pray that God keeps him and continues to mould him to be a vessel of honour. I pray that God will allow him to be further refined to be an even more fruitful branch attached to the True Vine. I pray that his heart’s desires are realised as they merge with kingdom plans. He deserves so much for the level of sacrifice he’s given over the years. I remain humbled to know Hughie Lawrence – may he go from strength to strength as he follows the paths of righteousness and grows in the grace and knowledge of our Lord and Saviour.

For His Name's Sake

Shalom

dmcd

Ruth Dryden - How Times Have Changed

So September is a big indicator that the end of the year is nigh. After this month we enter the last quarter of the year and things definitely start winding down in preparation for that much-loved hibernation season known as the winter. In the run up to that great time of year the Dryden family runs into a glut of birthdays, first is my Dad – but you know that already. In October my brother has a month all to himself for a birthday. In November I celebrate my love for life and the good things God has given me. I used to be the last Dryden with a birthday in the calendar. Then on 29^th December 2004 Deborah popped along to crock a snook at anyone thinking they could muscle in on things. Her birthday is ideally located between the excitement of the festivities and the excitement of the New Year activities.

A crucial birthday in among all that took place yesterday as my sister Ruth by the glorious grace of God made it to 33. Reflecting on her reaching this landmark allows me to reflect on just what an achievement it is and how far we’ve come. There are those who like to think that they have pretty much remained the same. No major change has taken place in their character even though they’ve experienced so much. I’m fairly confident in saying quite a lot has happened for both of us that have changed our characters.

Without going into detail the story of my sister’s life over the last five years or so would leave some people with their mouths agape at just how good God has been and how resilient and brave Ruth has been in it all. You cannot go through all of that experience and not have your character moulded somewhat. It would be easy for my sister to adapt a more cynical spirit in the light of some of the things she has endured and yet there burns within her a hope in God strengthened more than ever before.

On the one hand it would be fair to say that we’ve grown apart in those five years. Not to say we’re no longer in each other’s lives, on the contrary her place in the annals of the history of Christopher Dryden is already assured. She remains an incredibly strong and considered character. Her insight into things and capacity for equanimity is quite remarkable, she’s able to insist on something without being too imposing. Yet it is clear who the boss is in any given situation and I continue to pray for her husband in that regard!

You know the Bible talks about when you leave your mum and dad and cleave to your wife stating quite clearly that a separation takes place on marriage. There’s nothing said about the dynamic between brother and sister but I can say that there has been a definite shift in priorities where my wife is now the best friend and Ruth is focussed on her own issues. I’ve changed in that respect, but I still love having my sister around and being able to ask her for advice in given situations.

I see aspects of my sister’s character especially in my younger daughter Abigail – that clear minded thing about her that says it’s her way that will be the case and no one will say anything otherwise. Despite being the younger, Abigail has no problems being the bully when the mood takes her and I sometimes chuckle at what she can do to get her own way from the straightforward blunt approach to a more psychological factor. That’s Ruth all over, who now knows that she will get her way without saying a word. For all that though, Ruth is a tremendously loyal and caring woman. She takes it on board to be a conduit for all family manners and will keep in touch for all major personal milestones – anniversaries, birthdays, etc.

In so many ways Ruth and I have changed and yet there remains that huge admiration for all she is and all that she has overcome in my life. I pray that God will give her more grace to go on and achieve what God has in store for her.

For His Name's Sake

Shalom

dmcd

Thanks Father For My Dad

You may have noticed yesterday that the entry mentioned my mother. I may have mentioned before, family is very important to me, especially the immediate family in which I was brought up. I was brought up in an isolated background so my siblings and parents meant a great deal to me. Mum and Dad recently celebrated 34 years since their wedding. It is quite a feat to make it to that number and now with their three children all producing grandchildren for them it is such a significant time to rejoice in their marital union.

More significant still, however, is yesterday was my dad celebrate his 76^th year on the planet. I don’t blog that much about my dad. I’ll blog about my mum and my brother in particular, but not really about my sister and rarer still about my dad. This is not deliberate; it’s just the way the thoughts and notes have come about.

The measure of manhood for me was started off by my dad. For the changes that have taken place in my life and the various male figures who have been role models it all starts and ends with my dad. He was no big shot. Never really headed for the front or taking the limelight, my dad is the epitome of understated. It is easy to overlook the contribution that my dad would make to anything, but his absence would definitely be noticed. He never needed to say much at all and so when he did speak more often than not it was always worth paying careful attention.

Up until my married life my dad remained something of a mystery in terms of who he was. He was not one to reveal himself and get all autobiographical. He was not into physical displays of affection, but his presence and unstinting loyalty meant more than anything. It really appeared as if nothing would phase him. That didn’t mean he was averse to quirks. The most endearing quality are the little oddities that will incur his wrath – wearing shoes in the house when we had slippers for example.

So as my dad goes from strength to strength enjoying the fruit of his labours back at his home in Jamaica I have to give God thanks for the life of my dad.

Thanks Father for my dad’s consistency – the unwavering way in which he persisted in his home responsibilities without complaint.

Thanks Father for my dad’s patience – refusing to allow situations to stress him out and looking to keep a calm composure in every situation. Indeed thanks that dad was the guy that kept his head while others were losing theirs.

Thanks Father for my dad’s sense of perspective – whether in success or failure he knew in Whom he believed and that there was nothing more important than realising that everything was in Your hands.

Thanks Father for my dad’s sense of justice – regardless of whatever anyone thought, thanks that he looked to act fairly in all his dealings and his integrity would not be questioned by anyone.

Thanks Father for my dad’s sense of humour – living up to his surname always with a wry sense of humour fit for the occasion and easy on the laughing.

Thanks Father for my dad’s persistence – despite not being academically inclined his dedication to learning to develop reading every night would significantly impact his children.

Thanks Father for my dad’s simplicity – as others chase the futility of material gain my dad showed the real value of those things of an eternal nature – Christ-like humility and following Him always.

Thanks Father for my dad’s worshipful vulnerability – whenever he was abandoned to Your presence in praise and adoration he and you would share in ways that we may not have seen in him otherwise.

Thanks Father for my dad – his good bits, his bad bits, the way he has garnered so much appreciation from those who know and love him. Thanks that his legacy is seen in the positive qualities of his children and those that whom he would befriend.

I used to say that if I was half the man that my dad was then I’d be doing well, but I’ve grown to appreciate that my dad has done what he could in his life to put down the markers for his children to go further than he has gone. I don’t know if I’ll ever make it, but I do know that the faith of my father in the Father rests in me and I will like him endeavour to do all that God calls me to do. Hopefully one day dad and I will share all our life’s pursuit in eternal praise of the Father who makes it possible. In the meantime this is a small token of the great appreciation, love and affection I have for my dad and our Father in heaven who has made this relationship what it is.

For His Name's Sake

Shalom

dmcd

She

Authrine.

I had never come across a name like that before I met her and it’s not been that frequent that I’ve seen since I’ve met her. Indeed I’ve not come across an Authrine since. She is as unique as her name. I’ve known her for nearly ten years now. In that time I’ve continued to be amazed at the things I’ve got to know about her.

Getting to know people is a fascinating thing, as in really getting to know them, intimately, warts and all. One of the things that really attracted me to her was her incredible heart. She has such a beautiful heart. She is the nearest an adult can get, in my experience, to a child-like naivety when it comes to issues. That is attractive. It is untainted by cynical, sceptical and sarcastic spirit. It leaves her open to take on certain things and even be suckered into other things as I have enjoyed on one or two occasions. However it is not that she is a fool at all and she can get wise to people and be wary of them, but she has a heart for people. When she is for you there are few greater allies to have on your side. Loyalty is something that I’ve rarely seen expressed so passionately, doggedly and resolutely. It makes me humble to know that God would bless me so richly with such a woman.

Her heart for God as well as a treasure and an example to many. I am so glad that the children of my youth have a tremendous model to follow in her. She can be vulnerable, she can be transparent. She is not one to have hidden agendas and although she hasn’t quite graduated from Diplomacy College as yet she has come on leaps and bounds in terms of her approach to people. I could write for a considerable length on the character strengths of my wife in a manner fairly detached and observational all to the glory of God. I would have to leave it others to see what impact I’ve had on her. All I do know is that I have been a challenge to her – my foibles, my weaknesses, my variety of moods, my way of life – it is completely different to her regular bloke. It’s not easy being a friend so you can imagine how much more difficult it is for someone to be married to me. To her eternal credit she has stuck to it and got better at it as the years have gone by. I love her more now than ever before not for the beautiful children she has brought forth or the beautiful homes she has created, but for the beautiful person that she grows to become with every passing year.

So as she celebrates her 21^st birthday today for the –th time you can imagine the lengths I went to in celebrating the scene. Imagine. The birthday girl makes it back home. I help her out of her coat and lead her blind-folded to the dining room where she finds the room lit by black and red scented candles with a hint of jasmine and peaches bathing the room with the light and fluorescent glow and haze of romance. Her squeal lets out her delight at the surprise and she settles down to three courses of carefully crafted morsels of culinary delight that sends her taste-buds into a stratosphere of ecstasy. It is nothing too heavy or too sweet, but just right for her mouth and her fine figure. As the last vestiges of the dessert are finished with aplomb, she looks gooey-eyed at her servant-husband, waiting hand and foot at her beck and call. She enjoys a glass of sparkling Schloer as she talks softly with her beau of the many things that she has to give thanks for in her life.

Then as she relaxes and gets comfortable she is escorted up the stairs to another candle-lit room – it is the bathroom and there are rose petals in the bath waiting for her to descend into the warm cosy relaxing soap-sudded bath. As she settles in, her back is given a relaxing scrub and she is given plenty of time to just soak. All other matters have been dealt with by that servant-husband of hers, children dispatched compassionately and effectively, all things in the house are stable, her mind is at ease and the dulcet tones of Luther echoes through the bathroom to allow her to swoon at the thought of the emotions of love Vandross releases in stereo. At just the right time, she is helped from the bath into one of her birthday gifts and warm nightgown with her initials on the pockets. Carefully assisted to the bedroom she is treated to a full body massage with further musical treats on saxophone and smooth jazz. Such is her state of contentment that the strains of the day are massaged away and she slowly falls asleep to the sounds of love, romance and wedded bliss.

And having imagined that you have got exactly the scenario I would have liked to have offered to my beloved tonight. As it was, we went to our regular First Sunday Fast and having left for the church centre at 12:30pm we didn’t get back until after 10pm. Needless to say that the evening of service with a smile didn’t quite work out, but I did lay on for my wife what has made our relationship survive – my love. My love in words, my love in action and my love in extolling and thanking God for the most beautiful woman and the right help-mate for me (despite misgivings). I love my wife, my friend, my confidant, my lover and my co-labourer with Christ. I pray that God will spare our lives together to grow further in Him and that she will blossom to become all that God has called her to be for His honour and glory. Maybe next year, if God spares our lives, I’ll give her something like that imaginary scene – she deserves a lot better obviously. Until then I will endeavour by the grace of God to love her more and love her better. Thank you Lord for her, please bless her with your peace, love and wisdom so that she can walk in a manner pleasing to you.

For His Name's Sake

Shalom

dmcd

Abi Birthday

As it’s so close to the time I still remember the events leading up to the birth of my second child and Authrine’s third child. As with Deborah the second birth did not arrive on time. The circumstances were different in the sense that the tension, drama and trauma around the first were not so pronounced in the second.

As night fell on Sunday 28th May 2006 I went to sleep not expecting a disturbance, but low and behold after 1am the wife woke me up insisting she was having the pains more regularly. Thankfully our friend Hughie was awake and ready to come to our aid, so eventually we made it in the hospital for minutes to 3 in the morning. There it was not a long protracted process at all. Indeed it was at 3:29am on Monday 29th May 2006 that Abigail Elizabeth Danielle Dryden made her appearance on planet earth.

Abigail was immediately different to her older sister in being very light in skin tone. This was the source of much merriment among the extended family especially our church family who would have launched enquiries as to the legitimate father of the child. Praise be to God, however, there were distinctive features that could have only come from the Dryden side of the equation.

Since her birth I’ve found Abigail’s development fascinating. It’s not unusual to see her mimicking her sister and others around her. She already wants to help with chores around the house and of course is investigating what’s going on around the house and creating chaos as well as helping in the clean up process. She’s quite something else is Abigail.

I love her smile and her giggle and laugh and making her laugh is harder than making her mother laugh so it’s always an achievement when my efforts hit home! She is a beautiful baby and I often chuckle at the fact that she’s of all people the daughter of Christopher Dryden! No she’s not perfect by any stretch of the imagination, but she is such a blessing to my life that I’m grateful to know her and have the privilege and honour of being her father.

For His Name's Sake
Shalom
da man cd

Thank God For ... Hughie Lawrence

On Friday my friend Hughie celebrated his birthday. I would tell you how old he is, but then he'd have to kill me, and Deborah says I haven't got enough money for her inheritance for me to die now, so you'll just have to ask the guy yourself.

The history of the relationship between Hughie and me goes back to the days that I was knee-high to a grasshopper it’s fair to say that I’ve known of the guy for the best part of 20 years. In1994 he was the Director (and founder) of the National Church’s Summer Retreat for young people and although it will go down with me as one of the WORST TIMES OF MY LIFE, one of the highlights was the way that Hughie really looked out for David and me. He really was a most helpful dude in checking if we were alright and stuff. I never forgot that, and I’ll always be grateful to him for doing that when no one else really did.

Put the clock forward three/four years and a more confident Christopher Dryden is at university having a whale of a time studying for a Philosophy and Politics degree in Essex. More significantly I am also getting well into radio through the student radio station. Here I am seriously consider taking it up as a profession for the future. To do that I need to get inside. Whose name should come wafting my way but that of a BBC Radio journalist and producer/presenter of gospel shows for UCB/Cross Rhythms – one H. Lawrence. I wrote a letter to him asking how I could get involved and if he could possibly help. The brother actually kept and read the letter … and left it for a year or two.

Then I saw a chance to link up with him by joining an evangelism programme he was developing. I signed up even though I didn’t have that heart of an evangelist. I linked up with Hughie and he suggested that I come up to Stoke-on-Trent to see his digs and see what he gets up to. The end of the year around this time there was scheduled to be a time of fasting and prayer in Stoke. So while he was in London promoting a concert, I linked with him and took the trip up the M6.

I look back fondly on that time. I had no idea what ministry really meant, always relating it to just a bloke standing in front of lectern chatting about what we should and shouldn’t do while working up a sweat for himself and his ‘listeners’. But that first experience of the prayer/fasting retreat under the leadership of Hughie was an eye-opener in terms of how ministry really engulfs your whole life. Hughie and I talked further and agreed that in February 2000 I would come up to do some work with a guy he knew who was based at the same radio station as he was.

When the Bible says the just shall live by faith, it is not just a light statement about believing God to pay your bill, it’s a life’s commitment to making unpopular, unconventional and uncomfortable decisions on the basis of having a knowing in your heart that this is what God wants for you. My family wasn’t thrilled at the fact that I’d left a fair paying job and stability in the capital city to go back to the middle of nowhere without a paying job. Yet I can look back and know without a shadow of a doubt that God was the author of it and I duly experienced tremendous spiritual blessing in getting to know God better and pursue Him with my whole being. Hughie was hugely instrumental in this. He allowed me to follow him on his many missions, whether it was a concert or an event or whatever the case was, I got insight into what it took to be a full-time minister of the gospel. I am convinced that Hughie did (and continues to do) a great deal for the gospel despite having a full-time job. Hughie walked the walk as well and talking the talk – and man did he ever talk! Now that is an awesome role-model to have.

He allowed me to share in some of his dreams and visions for Kingdom development, hence the Stoke-on-Trent church which came about after another end of year prayer and fasting session featuring Angela, Authrine, Hughie and myself. It was an exciting time and a challenging time, but with a good friend like Hughie I felt good going forward in faith believing that God would give us the victory. We prayed and studied together believing Him for the provision to support the vision we knew He had for Stoke-on-Trent. It was proven in the facility we now have at our disposal and the many contacts we developed. There’s just no way all of this could have come about if it wasn’t for God on our side.

So the guy – who was my best man at the wedding, a job he wouldn’t have done unless he felt called to do it – this guy was my best male friend for the last six years or so. He was there supporting my spiritual development like no one else before or after him. He’s more of a spiritual father to me that my own real dad was. He showed me what it is to be real in God and yet still powerful in His might than any other living person on the planet. I love Hughie Lawrence.

To reiterate, Hughie, I give God thanks for you. I’m grateful that you allowedme near your inner sanctum for the best part of at least three years. Thank you for allowing me to minister with you and witness you minister in the lives of others. Thank you for giving me the opportunity to experience real-life ministry and as a result gain a deeper relationship with our Father through the power of the Holy Spirit and the Son Jesus Christ. Thank you for sharing part of the vision God gave you and empowering me to explore aspects of my abilities that were untapped previously. Thank you for believing in me when other people did not even consider me. Thank you for praying with me and for me. Thank you for studying with me. Thank you for watching football with me. Thank you for getting me to PLAY football with you. Thank you for the jokes, the insights, the mistakes, the good times and bad. Thank you Hughie for being my friend.

For His Name's Sake

Shalom

dmcd