When I'm In A Funk In The Twilight Zone

As I’m appreciating all the more, life is not about what we want and desire at any given time. I am appreciating that it is about flexing around the needs of others and being sensitive to the responsibility that vocation brings about in your life. So even when you don’t have your own ICT equipment, the world does not stop turning, your pregnant wife does not stop requiring your love and devotion, your children do not stop needing your paternal attention and care, your workplace does not stop requiring your services for the people that live and work there. Life goes on.

Ideally, left up to me, I’d be at me own home this evening merrily typing away at some inspiration that I’d want to turn into something or other, whilst listening to quality music and also having the girls scampering around to the music. We don’t live in an ideal world and as people know at such a crazy period as moving, the interim period can be a bind. So I find myself in that crazy twilight zone of having moved to Salford already – the vast majority of the earthly possessions of Christopher Dryden are now there. Yet my time at work in Stoke has not yet ended. So mentally, emotionally and in every other way I’m already up there busy thinking about to sort things out for the next step. Physically though I’m still here. Tough life, but someone’s got to live it because the pregnant wife, the children, the workplace, etc. don’t stop even if I want to!

Something that provides encouragement and motivation in this limbo period is good company. I’m blessed to have a Saviour who doesn’t just save to fly away, but saves and then settles within and through the Comforter I am not alone in limbo. So He keeps me going with promptings of opening up things that I didn’t see before when I considered even the most basic scriptures. For example did you know that the end of Genesis 2 defies the most basic thing we learn in mathematics? The implications of that are greater than just a maths quandary. Not only things like that, but he also gives me an insight into the kind of fun things that are ahead even if it would be challenging.

Good company takes you out of the funk you maybe in and keeps your eyes on the prize – that prize is the high calling in Christ, that prize is eternity with Him – no more moving, thank God!

For His Name’s Sake
Shalom
dmcd

Jesus My Motivation

Being a follower of Christ is not an automatic daily trek. There are elements of discipline to it and there are routines that help to build healthy habits once they are firmly embedded in life. For all that, though, because this is a journey and an ongoing progress there is always something to challenge us and make us think about where we’re going and how we’re going to get there.

It is another superb Sabbath evening, though it be raining outside, and I’m grateful to God for so many wonderful blessings over another challenging week.

Today I was at the Beacon House of Prayer, a place to which I regularly take a group of people from the YMCA to explore faith in a bit more detail or just to relax and find some peaceful, prayerful, meditative experiences. There is an angel at the Beacon who faithfully every Friday gives me a bag of fruit. Today she gave TWO bags of fruit to me! Ode to joy. Now you may recall, if you’ve read your bible, there’s the episode where the spies go into the promised land to check it out and come back with some large bounty. Well, let me tell you, the grapes in today’s bag of fruit was perhaps as big as the bounty they brought! My goodness they were large grapes for which I am truly grapeful, as are the rest of my people who will share in the bounty!

Anyway, as I sit enjoying the Sabbath evening in the knowledge that my family are likewise chilling in various parts of the home, I’m watching a television adaptation of Pilgrim’s Progress called Dangerous Journey. It looks like it was produced quite a while ago by Yorkshire Television, but it’s a fascinating watch. I’m on about the third episode where Christian meets Formalist and Hypocrisy.

Now I’m aware that one of the standards of a true believer that as well as the Bible, you’re meant to have read Pilgrim’s Progress. Alas I have not read it. I think my dad had a copy at home, but I don’t recall ever picking it up. Indeed I’ve never even picked it up to see if I wanted to read, let alone read it. So although I’ve heard references to it and the like, this is the first time I’ve actually tackled the book, even if it’s a television adaptation, that I’m watching on YouTube (now talk about crossing the media over the years). Now by television adaptation it is one of those illustrated stories with a narrator talking over the pictures. It still makes for good viewing.

Watching it reminds me of some of the challenges I’ve experienced today. In the story so far, what’s apparent is that Christian’s journey only continues when he’s reminded of his motivation – why he is doing what he is doing. I find it really difficult to motivate myself sometimes. Indeed, to be fair, often on my life’s journey self-motivation has been a huge issue. It has not been too encouraging to be reminded of this weakness in none too constructive a manner, which can be the tactic of some. On reflection, however, with no desire to appear to have cracked the subject, there has been clear indication that there have been a number of victories in the department. So as I grapple with the motivation issue, I am reminded of the key to success in these struggles.

That key is simple, remember Christ. Now that in itself is a fairly monumental piece of advice, because it is the equivalent to remember the Encyclopaedia Britannica times infinity. Not just the miraculous birth, the parables, the miracles, the teaching, the agony, the crucifixion, the resurrection, the ascension and promised return, but even more – His very character, His role in the Old Testament, His role in the post apostolic era.

Thinking about Him as my motivation does not get rid of the circumstances that affected me in the first place. Indeed in some cases those circumstances persist and become at times rather more aggravating. What the focus does, however, is remind me of the journey that I am on and the goal that I seek, the One whom I profess to love and devote my life. Sometimes even stopping and engaging in some of the information about who He is can actually make thankful for the trouble in the first place, because it gave such an opportunity to be reminded of such a great Saviour.

I remember seeing some people spoof the acting profession and say a phrase to the director ‘where’s my motivation’. It’s not always apparent in the middle of trying times and difficult decisions, but my motivation remains ever present, always reminding me that He intends to stay that way to the very end. That He is all my sufficiency and as long as I keep my eyes on Him and my mind stayed on Him, then progress will be made for this pilgrim.

For His Name's Sake

Shalom

dmcd

When Good Neighbours Become Good Friends

I’m not sure what wisdom there is to help with the nature of your countenance on being awoken from some effort to get some kip. Are the fruit of the Spirit meant to be evident when you’ve been stirred from your slumbers by something of gross irrelevance and stupidity, even if that is just perceived? What are you like in those circumstances? Does the love of Christ just ooze from you naturally to those who have disturbed you?

No that’s not the theme of this post, but it’s a good way of getting some of those illusive questions of life off my chest.

So I was disturbed from my slumbers by some people who had responded to the wife’s ebay business, so they came to collect their loot. That’s not a problem, perfectly reasonable especially as there had been a prior arrangement agreed with the wife before this time. (Apparently, according to an episode of Law & Order: Criminal Intent, if I should refer to Authrine as the wife again it maybe an indicator that we’re separated. That’s really funny. As in that kind of deduction, not being separated from Authrine. We’re not separated. We’re very much together.)

Where was I? Oh yeah, the people coming to collect their loot. Yeah, that’s fine, no problem with that, but then some other people turned up and asked what I perceived at the time in my recently awoken state to be irrelevant and stupid questions. My ire was not raised sufficiently to unleash the full force of Dryden sardonic wit and sarcasm in a dismissive manner to establish their gross inferiority at that time. I did however make it clear that there was no further room for conversation other than through monosyllaballic answers. (What do you mean monosyllaballic isn’t a word? What is it then?)

Taking the hint the perps in question did not stay long. It was as they were leaving and the ebay purchasers moved on that my wife chose that time to make her presence known – timing indeed worthy of her relatively new name – Dryden. (For if there is one thing I love with a passion is timing things in such a way that I avoid as much fuss as possible and just live in the tranquillity of the aftermath.) As she parked up, our next door neighbour was also at the door, perhaps her attention was taken with the moving carrying on. In any case, so there I was in the arched doorway where the next door neighbour could not see me, and there was the wife coming out of the car to see both her and me in our respective though next door archways.

Ever the recluse I took this as my hint to withdraw into the confines of my front room, whilst the wife engaged in conversation with our neighbour. On finally coming into the house my beloved partner of days shared the nature of the conversation and it acted as a spur to write this entry.

If you are unaware let me make it clear to you that followers of Jesus have challenges in various elements of the following. He often calls us to do things and be things that draw us out from ourselves into Himself. It differs from person to person. For me I’ve had tremendous challenges being a good neighbour. I have not overcome totally as yet, but I can see where over the last ten years I’ve made some progress in the area thanks to a lot of good influences like my wife, my church leader Hughie, my boss Danny and others.

Recently the local church was highlighting a series on Compassion 2009 and I had the privilege of going through some of the parables of Jesus and highlighting how compassion was at His source of the mission and ministry. I spent a month or two (one session a week, not every day of the month, although we probably could have done that) exploring the story of the Good Samaritan as found in Luke. Checking that whole episode in its immediate context and relating it to other significant things that God had been outlining since Cain knocked off his brother is highly revelatory for what the basics are in terms of loving your neighbour whether it is your enemy that’s suffering, or your next door neighbour.

Funnily enough at the same time I’d moved from one area of the city to another. You may recall I’d written copiously on the subject at the time. So as we settled down in the place where we are currently residing it was one of my desires to put this in action and show an active interest in the welfare of our neighbours. It was definitely a trip on the odd for me with my tendency to keep myself locked up and reading, writing or that kind of stuff. It’s not that I’m anti-social completely, as the friends I have can attest, I can be quite the conversationalist more than capable of banter. I am also very keen to develop relationships properly – not just based on projects and schemes that we’re doing together, but based on an interest in the person for who I discover them to be, and how I can likewise share my vulnerabilities with them. So the only barrier to me being a good neighbour has always been to take the initiative to engage with my neighbour.

In the six and a half years of married life to Authrine, it’s quite something to see how she naturally gravitates to being a good neighbour in building relationships with them and striking a knowing rapport as her retiring, reclusive husband hides himself behind another book. She has such an amiable spirit that on meeting her it’s difficult to take offense, unless you’re just ornery by nature.

So in terms of where we are at the moment I remember the key was down to doing something as simple as knocking on their front door to introduce myself. Talk about ice-breaker. (No we never played the game where you have to say three things about yourself with one of them being false and the other looking to see which one it is … although I might try that the next time we move … or not.) I believe the neighbours, for it is a married couple of whom I talk, were very happy to receive such a pleasant approach from their new neighbours.

I’m not going to unfold a tale of burgeoning love and devotion among us as neighbours, but we did get to know each other somewhat. Although it took us a remarkably long time to settle down, our neighbours were alright. One particular episode that stands out in the recollection of good times was one Sunday afternoon/evening. Authrine and I had stayed in a bit later than scheduled for whatever reason and we were just off to the COG facility to engage in another church session. Authrine’s car however had suffered from the dreaded dead battery. We looked to our neighbours for help and they came out and did their best with their vehicles to see if they could get the vehicle started. As it turned out they couldn’t, but it turned out to be a wonderful opportunity for the whole family to engage with the couple as we waited for the repair/recovery dudes to pop along.

I remember it as well because another neighbour from an area around the corner from where we lived also popped along and tried to help. What didn’t help the guy was that he was obviously more than familiar with alcohol and had a certain manner about him that others would have judged him on as a slovenly, suspicious, sinister, drunkard. I say that, because that’s usually my safe preference when encountering such characters. Thankfully on this occasion the compassion of Christ emerged in me to actually see this neighbour as another traveller on life’s journey who had a distinctive tale to tell. So with his mangy mutt I spent most of the rest of the evening getting to know him and share a little bit about love whilst engaging in his fascinating story and I’d like to think the brother felt all the better for a chance to have a decent conversation, and as well as that I thought he’d given me the protection of the area as he knew the crack of what went on. Funnily enough, our next door neighbour weren’t as forthcoming in being hospitable, but at least there was nothing offensive in their approach to relations.

That was just one of a number of quality episodes in getting to know our neighbours and getting on well with them. As a result I know a bit more about what it is to be a good neighbour both from the one who is being it as well one who is the recipient of it. It is good. It is godly. It is a good bridge to building relationships with those on our doorstep in the hope of shining the light of Christ through our characters so that they can have a view of it and possibly begin to share in the journey to Christ. I am aware that it costs, after all as any good relationship will testify, it is not about superficial matters on which good relations rest, it is on the costly acts of transparency, vulnerability, compassion and developing intimacy. That sort of stuff can get tricky from time to time, but ultimately when it’s lead by the source of all love, you cannot go wrong.

And now to live that further when we move on because as one prophet said that’s when good neighbours become good … friends. (Check this for more on the same lines.)

For His Name's Sake

Shalom

dmcd

Make Yourself At Home

I read this article about the true nature of the Biblical church and I say a hearty amen to this picture of a community of house churches coming together. That of course would shatter quite a lot of edifices and structures that we have built around our current perception of church life. That’s cool with me as long as the life of Christ can be released through the people of Christ being focussed on proclaiming Christ.

The reason why it is such an issue to me has a lot to do with my history. Growing up I attended a local fellowship whose membership didn’t really go over 15 adult members. My brother, sister and I were the only young people there from the time I was 12 until I left for university with the exception of the grand-children of the pastor. The picture I’m painting here sees our main service for the week having maybe seven adults there on a regular basis and then from time to time we would have visitors from Peterborough and Northampton.

As I got into my teens I asked why are we spending so much money renting out a hall that no one visits except for a few people? Why don’t we just have services at home? That idea was a non-starter I feel because of the tradition of the church. We’d always had a hall, we would always have a hall regardless of how little effect it actually has on the community around it and regardless of how little effective relationships were developed.

Yet sometimes we would have some mid-week prayer meetings in people’s homes that felt a lot warmer in character and relaxed in feel. Although there was not a case that it would actually get me interested in prayer – let’s not get crazy – at least it beat having to go to a hall. Indeed I often think back on those naïve days where Christianity was the faith of my parents that I snuggled up to for convenience but no real relationship with Jesus. In those days prayer meetings were boring and only good for kneeling down, bowing my head and going to sleep, or seeing if I could sneak in a read of the comic that I hid in my coat. Dude, it was hilarious witnessing the prayer races where the saints would compete to see who could pray the longest – cos obviously the longer you pray the more the prayer means to God as the scripture says. (Hold on a minute which scri… waddaya mean don’t ask those questions?)

Anyway, back on my theme, when I think about it, my life started at home. My understanding of life was birthed from home experiences. There’s nothing as personal as the home. There’s no place where I’m more relaxed than at home. It’s a great sign of personal trust to invite someone to your home and I was thought it was an honour to be allowed inside someone’s home. It’s a great atmosphere to reflect and relax. More than anywhere it is a location where life takes place without masks.

Sure, the reality can often be that people have bad experiences at home for one reason or another and it doesn’t work for some people. I don’t want to give the impression that home was an idyll of bliss from the horrors of the outside world – things were not perfect. What I do want to suggest and its something intensely personal from the relational perspective of family that linked to family is the concept of home. Home not just as a closed place, but as an intimate location where you can be real, vulnerable and experience sanctuary and rest like nowhere else.

That’s why I find it so tragic that there’s such a great rush to ‘get a building’. As if the mark of being a proper church is to have a ‘building’. Almost as though we forget that the building project Jesus was on was building people – and that work was not about doing it in a particular facility, but developing the kind of warm relationships filled with the Spirit of God – around a meal if you will – that reflected the concept of being part of a family. I saw it as natural that when those environments are developed and more people get interested that it’s then that you determine the need for a larger facility to house those interested. Even then, that was never essential in my reading of what made for church growth as actual development of people in Christ and reaching others to do the same.

I am not completely against large facilities for use of Christian activities and even large gatherings of church. I’m sure they have their function in the work of church. What I am saying is that the neglect of the whole house to house thing misses a really basic structure for church growth and for the development of all those who are part of here.

Let’s face it, where are you more likely to express you – in a fairly impersonal gathering of a large number people in which you can remain anonymous and the focus is on an individual or a group of individuals on a raised platform directing proceedings, or relaxed on a couch seated next to people who evidently care for you and there’s no pressure on you to share, but there is a desire to do so because you’re among people doing something special. It is all about getting the right ingredients to create the right meal for people to taste and see that the Lord is good. That I think can work in the home arguably better than anywhere else.

For His Name’s Sake
Shalom
dmcd