Thanks For The Things That Last

As I’ve noted before I’ve just suffered for the umpteenth time the fact that me hard drive has been corrupted seeing the end of a lot of work over 2009 and usually bringing on a season of mourning and great sadness. It did cause considerable inconvenience over the time I was without it and I won’t pretend it didn’t hurt at the time. Yet unlike on previous occasions the feeling of loss wasn’t overwhelming and causing a sense of misery in me life.

Likewise as you may have noticed Liverpool have been doing poorly in the Premier League at a time when we were expecting them to be challengers for the title. Result after result has been disappointing as display after display has been less than good enough. I recall a time when these kind of results would cause considerable misery in my life and make my moods less than pleasant at the best of times. Yet unlike on those previous occasions the feeling of loss wasn’t overwhelming and causing a sense of misery in me life.

The nature of the move we’ve made has been quite traumatic and what it has involved has been really taxing emotionally, physically, relationally and spiritually. It would usually be my style to be thrust into an intense season of depression and inactivity where I feel rejected by those near and dear to me. That would usually bring about questioning and suspicion on anyone and everyone and a seeming inability to get on with my life. Yet unlike on previous occasions the feeling of loss wasn’t overwhelming and causing a sense of misery in me life.

You’ll probably notice a trend in recent events in the life of dmcd and there’s a good reason for that. This came to the fore of things recently. The wife and I were watching Gladiator yesterday. Now when I offered to watch that with her, she was concerned that I actually said Gladiators. Now let’s be clear, I’m not sure if you can two more opposing programme and media concepts as these two. I won’t try to look for similar things of great difference. On the one hand you have a moving tale of loss and retribution and on the other you have a tacky show of ‘athleticism’ with a catchphrase by one of it’s presenters that was ripped off from Red Dwarf.

In any case so we’re watching the movie starring Russell Crowe and enraptured with the story of a general of men who just wants to return to his home – his family, his wife, his precious son. Then because of political conspiracy and the insecurity of a power-hungry weak son, all that he holds dear is ripped away from him. We are left to wonder what can you live for when all you have is gone?

So what am I talking about? The extension of the question is, why invest in something that can be taken away from you so easily? How fragile is life? How temporary are the things around us – like the success of football teams, like hard-drives, like relationships? I’m not saying have a negligent approach to these issues. When it comes to relationships our whole time on this earth is to make the most of them and share those intangible qualities that make them so special. Herein, however, lies the point behind the different approach I’ve had to the above issues.

Those intangible qualities refer to the eternal characteristics of God – what makes a relationship worthwhile? Love. Unconditional, supportive, always faithful, always encouraging and in every sense a force that looks to see the positive and walk through the negative towards that positive. It’s not a tangible quality. It’s not something that is sold at this year’s sales before VAT rises. It’s not something that was being pushed that well when the recent season was being held. It’s not something that is popularised for what it is through the year, although it is often perverted and distorted to lure and entice mugs into their lair.

I’ve been able to cope a little bit better under these and other storms in life because I’m learning that the investment that matters most to me in life is the investment in life with Christ. The crucial elements of life worth living for are the eternal treasures to be found in the Kingdom of God as found in a relationship with Him through His Son by his Spirit with the promise that this will not be ripped away by the insecurities of man and the powers that be, but will last forever. When I invest in something like that, there’s just no way that I can lose, even if hard-drives, football teams and relationships go by the wayside.

For His Name’s Sake

Shalom

dmcd

When I'm In A Funk In The Twilight Zone

As I’m appreciating all the more, life is not about what we want and desire at any given time. I am appreciating that it is about flexing around the needs of others and being sensitive to the responsibility that vocation brings about in your life. So even when you don’t have your own ICT equipment, the world does not stop turning, your pregnant wife does not stop requiring your love and devotion, your children do not stop needing your paternal attention and care, your workplace does not stop requiring your services for the people that live and work there. Life goes on.

Ideally, left up to me, I’d be at me own home this evening merrily typing away at some inspiration that I’d want to turn into something or other, whilst listening to quality music and also having the girls scampering around to the music. We don’t live in an ideal world and as people know at such a crazy period as moving, the interim period can be a bind. So I find myself in that crazy twilight zone of having moved to Salford already – the vast majority of the earthly possessions of Christopher Dryden are now there. Yet my time at work in Stoke has not yet ended. So mentally, emotionally and in every other way I’m already up there busy thinking about to sort things out for the next step. Physically though I’m still here. Tough life, but someone’s got to live it because the pregnant wife, the children, the workplace, etc. don’t stop even if I want to!

Something that provides encouragement and motivation in this limbo period is good company. I’m blessed to have a Saviour who doesn’t just save to fly away, but saves and then settles within and through the Comforter I am not alone in limbo. So He keeps me going with promptings of opening up things that I didn’t see before when I considered even the most basic scriptures. For example did you know that the end of Genesis 2 defies the most basic thing we learn in mathematics? The implications of that are greater than just a maths quandary. Not only things like that, but he also gives me an insight into the kind of fun things that are ahead even if it would be challenging.

Good company takes you out of the funk you maybe in and keeps your eyes on the prize – that prize is the high calling in Christ, that prize is eternity with Him – no more moving, thank God!

For His Name’s Sake
Shalom
dmcd

Divided Loyalties

Sometimes when I watch movies, especially James Bond ones, I listen out for when the title of the movie will be mentioned. (Obviously in my opinion Roger Moore always delivered his best of all the Bonds, that raised eyebrow just convinced me from the start.) I think that sometimes it is whilst writing the narrative or some dialogue in the narrative that the title for a book or a movie emerges, just as a significant theme in a song that is repeated can lend itself as the song title. In the same way I was engaging in a conversation when the phrase of this blog entry came to mind.

I said it to the person and it had a resonating effect on me. This dear friend had said some things around looking forward to spend more time with the family. I was thinking, however, that the reason why things have come to this point is because there’s always a competing force for the attention that means the family suffers.

I also thought that it’s not just this person who suffers from divided loyalties. To some extent there is an overriding interest that takes up the heart, even if the time is otherwise taken with other activities, the mind is just going over that issue again and again. It is so often the case that someone is physically present and to some degree engaging in the activity of the time, but it’s obvious that they are elsewhere either in spirit or mind. Their mind is taken up with their own thing of desire.

As ever Jesus exposes the issue slap bang in the middle of his famous teaching on the mount where he simply says,

No one can serve two masters, for either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve God and money. (Matthew 6:24)

That which captures the heart and takes up the attention has virtual mastery over us. It’s funny really, we run away from the sense of anyone owning us or telling us what to do. We make a big deal of being autonomous, independent, free-thinking individuals when in most cases, (come on it’s presumptuous and arrogant to say all in a blog like this when you’re not that brave yet) we’re actually not that autonomous, or independent or free-thinking. Sooner or later some master will take us under his wing – especially the enticing allure of money and all it can seemingly buy and what it can mean in the sight of others. We come under its wings and before you know it moods, thoughts, decisions, temperament, life activities and relationships are determined by what masters us.

Not only that, but it’s not as if there’s choice to be mastered or not. All this liberalism and free country jargon may keep us warm in our thoughts at night, but slavery has not been abolished, just either blatantly ignored in the so-called Third-World, or made to be far more sophisticated in the so-called First-World. Slavery and mastery is wrapped up with the whole human psyche and it’s then a case of discovering which mastery will give us the best chance of not being oppressed, compressed, distressed, depressed, repressed and even negatively possessed.

That sounds a bit harsh, doesn’t it. I’m not going to make it any softer, though. Think of it this way, though. As a slave if your master is responsible for upkeep and takes that seriously to ensure that your working conditions are as conducive and constructive to your benefit as possible and you are just required to be obedient to instructions that are actually to your overall benefit, how is that a bad thing? If the Lord who has mastery over us instructs us … commands us to love each other and empowers and equips us to do that how is that a bad thing? If the Lord who has mastery over us instructs us … to find the truest sense of liberty in being like His Son by linking with Him and allowing Him to carry the bulk of the burden how is that a bad thing?

Obviously it’s a bad thing to us because we don’t appear to be in control, even if we’ve been deluding ourselves in thinking that the autonomous, independent, free-thinking position has improved our situation. It’s got to be a definition of madness to think that illusive and elusive living is somehow any better.

The divided loyalty continues though and in reality it’s not that divided at all, whenever something else other than that which is meant to be occupying the heart is there, then we’re always giving cheap second-hand service to everything else. The funny thing is, under the Lordship of the creator there’s more than enough time to look after the family. There’s more than enough time to be effective at work. There’s even enough time to pursue pastimes that help you in building relationships and the like. Indeed under this mastery all of those activities are effused with life and purpose possible because it’s rooted in acknowledging first and foremost the Lord who makes it all possible.

Until then, though, it’s the ongoing challenge of seeing where the heart is and asking this kind, forgiving and liberating Lord to help us find our hearts in Him.

For His Name's Sake

Shalom

dmcd

Happy Christophermas

On this day a child was born, at this time a son was given and his name was called Christopher Luketon John Dryden.

Up until last night I wasn’t particularly bothered about putting together a blog about a day like today. I don’t think I’ve done it in the past. That all changed when I got the package from my sister which turned out to be my birthday gift. On the back of the packaging she put on a greeting that I couldn’t ignore. The text on it basically said Merry Christophermas! I’ve never had that before and it got me thinking about how good it is to celebrate someone’s birthday on his birthday! That’s a novel idea, might work in other areas as well if it was called for.

Anyway on this Christophermas Day I give God thanks for all the contributors to the life of Christopher Dryden. Thanks to my wonderful parents who invested their lives into making me a man who feared God and understood that without Him I would not make any progress in life. Thanks to two precious siblings who kept me sharp and have stuck by me, encouraging, scolding, rebuking, consoling, inspiring and sharing life with me.

Thanks to the church in which I grew up in Wellingborough which was a reliable stalwart of faith during those crucial formative years and brought a lot of smiles to my face and grounded me with an appreciation for the Bible.

Thanks to those schools that kept me occupied in those crucial formative years of my life – Croyland Nursery, Hardwick Infants, Victoria Infants and Victoria Junior. Thanks to those teachers who oversaw what educational development I made in those years. Thanks to the neighbours in Minerva Way and others in that Queensway estate who for me made my first seven years of existence appear in mind’s eye to be rather idyllic.

Thanks to Wrenn School for the years spent from naïve youngster to naïve know-it-all teenager. Thanks to the great teachers who irrevocably impacted my life not just with their love of education and teaching, but their obvious delight in helping people. Thanks to the other pupils whose engagement with me over that time was memorable for one reason or another.

Thanks to Essex University for the essential growing up years that needed to take place in exposing me to the big bad and good and indifferent world. Thanks for the people who opened my eyes to the fact that people don’t fit easy boxes and life is so wonderfully messy, diverse and complex. Thanks to the Windsor Fellowship and the Department of Environment, Transport and the Regions (at the time) that also significantly gave so much in terms of work-life

Thanks to the folks at the church in Peckham who took me in during the university years and made me feel a part of them. Thanks to the love and grace of some people who took me under their wing and tried to help cultivate someone still very rough around the edges. Thanks to the care, attention and wider perspective of fellowship and church than I had previously known.

Thanks to the people on the CAMP Committee and in the CAMP Choir for years of insight into worship and offering God the best in song and through music. Thanks for the lessons of voluntary team work and administration – commitment and being at your best giving all you can and not performing to impress others.

Thanks to the British Conference of the Church of God (Seventh Day) that has given me the foundation of the faith in which I grew up. Thanks for the many characters who over my time on earth so far have made this journey so eventful, rich in incident and fascinating in its insight in religion, spirituality, culture, fellowship, worship, organisation administration, leadership, communication and building corporate identity.

Thanks to those who have journeyed with me in my years in Stoke-on-Trent – UCB/Cross Rhythms, Blue Mountain Housing Association, Staffordshire University Library and Learning Resource Services, MA Broadcast Journalism at Staffs University, North Staffordshire Racial Equality Council, Stoke-on-Trent City Council, Manchester Metropolitan University Education Unit, North Staffordshire YMCA, North Staffordshire African Caribbean Association, Saltbox Christian Centre and the various partnerships made with individuals over that time. Thanks to the various individuals I’ve come across in this time who have tremendously enriched my life through their example, conversation and inspiration. Thanks to the friends that I’ve made over this time who have really impressed me with the love they share and the way it has changed my heart and head.

Thanks to the members, associates and friends past and present of StokeCOG who have all played their part in affecting my whole understanding of what it is to be church. Thanks to that faith network that has made life so rewarding even in its darkest hour. Thanks to the exciting journey of church development and walking and talking the faith.

Thanks to all those people who popped up on the journey in those one shot moments of life never to be seen again but whose input has undoubtedly help write the story thus far. Thanks to the characters, personalities and figures across various media – books, magazines, web-sites, blogs, music, TV, radio, movies, etc. who have imprinted their creativity into my psyche.

Thanks to two delightful daughters who give me the honour and privilege of fathering. Thanks for their uninhibited love and smiles which they unfurl to melt my heart. Thanks for their stubbornness and insubordinate behaviour that hardens my resolve to let them know how out of love I need them to change their ways. Thanks for their capacity to learn and grow and their infectious spirit of life that reminds me that the purpose of life is to live so that others may enjoy their purpose to life.

Thanks to the partner of days that changed my life and my whole way of seeing the world around me and showing me that true love is more costly and more rewarding than could possibly be imagined. Thanks to the lover of my life who has such a huge heart that overwhelms me in its manifold expressions of that love. Thanks to the companion on life’s journey who loves to offload the issues that oppress and depress as well as excite and delight. Thanks for this supporter of her husband who has dedicated the rest of our days together to love in all of its fullness.

Thanks to the Heavenly Father who has allowed this wayward son to blunder from mishap to tragedy and been there to console and pick him up. Thanks to Him for calling me His son and marking an identity for me and giving me a purpose with gifts and abilities to assist but an innate dependence on Him for all that He is and does. Thanks to the Son who stands as a role model and focus of faith whose self-less life, passionate ministry, dynamic teaching, engaging healing, solid companionship, brutal death, triumphant resurrection, magnificent ascension and glorious return gives more than hope for life lived now. Thanks to the Servant King for showing grace and truth and equipping me with that desire and ability to keep that Kingdom agenda going in all of my life.

I have been a noted loner, but as already evidenced in this abbreviated roll-call of times and places, there are so many different faces that have been a part of the story and made it what it is today. Thanks to those and so many others who may have been overlooked. Thanks for your input good and bad. Thanks for making this a happy Christophermas.

For His Name's Sake

Shalom

dmcd

Frustration and Melancholy

I’m quite clear that not all the blog entries on this blog are great. Maybe not even good. Perhaps there are one or two that would be considered sub-standard, not really all that interesting or missing something somewhere. What keeps me blogging though is the discipline of getting the thing done from my head and/or my heart and put it out and motivate further thoughts for future blogs or at least keep the rhythm of thinking to write going. Sometimes it inspires me to consider day to day issues and connect to others and see where it goes.

Today for example two streams of thought ran through the day almost concurrently but one flow was in greater ebb at the beginning of the day than the end, and the other was rising towards the end of the day although had connections to the beginning.

This morning I was frustrated. I didn’t help it. I rather wallowed in it and were it not for the book I was reading on my way to work and subsequent distractions of work and the like, I would have reasoned myself into self-pity and a justified morose attitude. I flung myself in a huff to myself at the sense of injustice that caused the source of frustration. Sadly for the frustration, however, then I got a good word that was actually linked to something that nagged me about the frustration.

The good word was that frustration is an expression of anger. As I pondered on that further and the negative connotations of that it began to make sense. After all it is not in my experience that frustration has been associated with godly character and conduct. Usual bed-fellows of frustration include annoyance, irritation, impatience and pent up anger as well as that sense of injustice.

Digging further behind the reasons for frustration I also saw that frustration is something that comes along when a much desired outcome has been postponed – I can’t have something perhaps, or there’s been an issue that prevents some situation from taking place. Either way, my sense of control and passion to have things my way has been thwarted and that is not to the liking of my ego. Now I can mask it, perhaps divert energies elsewhere, but it still resides in my system unless it is resolved properly and I get over it, or I do something I regret. As far as I’m aware today I didn’t do something I regret, but that was only because of that good word that reminded me of where frustration really comes from.

What’s worse, though, is that there is something about frustration that makes a claim on who the most important person in my life is. I can hardly claim to love Jesus wholeheartedly when my reaction to plans thwarted is to throw my dummies away, get upset and refuse to co-operate with life as I should. That is a clear contradiction. That is to say frustration is an obstacle to real worship of God and a healthy relationship with Him. Obstacles to healthy relationship with God are a problem.

By deduction then, frustration is not really a God thing. After all, how can God get frustrated when He knows His plans will work out anyway? Don’t get me wrong, I’m sure God expresses feelings throughout scripture – that’s clear. For all of that, however, there is an element in which He knows His plans are never thwarted and the place of frustration is never needed if full confident faith is placed in Him like a child entrusts herself to her father. So frustration at times can be an expression of missing the focus of faith.

Of course this kind of learning can be on the surface of the mind without being embedded in the heart and I’m sure I’ll have plenty of opportunities to learn this and allow the Spirit to embed it deep into my persona as my place of trust for Him.

Oh and about the melancholy. On this score I heartily approve of seasons in life where melancholy is present. I don’t condone a life lived in melancholy, I don’t even see the value of extending a season of melancholy beyond its time, but I do believe that melancholy should be digested from time to time. I find melancholy can often be a good way of reflecting and contemplating how changes in life necessarily upsets the previously known order of things and can often require the departure of familiar friends – even if those friends are regular routines and habits.

Departures and goodbyes should be treated seriously, just as there should be joy and thanksgiving for whatever benefits have been received, so there should be that sense of loss that will happen as a result of the departure. That’s why we don’t dwell on melancholy we don’t want to get things out of perspective, but it’s exactly the desire to get things in perspective that should allow us to spend some time walking through with God in the attic of past things.

And on that note I must extend thanks for your time In reading these jaunts, it’s been a pleasure blogging for you.

For His Name's Sake

Shalom

dmcd

When Good Neighbours Become Good Friends

I’m not sure what wisdom there is to help with the nature of your countenance on being awoken from some effort to get some kip. Are the fruit of the Spirit meant to be evident when you’ve been stirred from your slumbers by something of gross irrelevance and stupidity, even if that is just perceived? What are you like in those circumstances? Does the love of Christ just ooze from you naturally to those who have disturbed you?

No that’s not the theme of this post, but it’s a good way of getting some of those illusive questions of life off my chest.

So I was disturbed from my slumbers by some people who had responded to the wife’s ebay business, so they came to collect their loot. That’s not a problem, perfectly reasonable especially as there had been a prior arrangement agreed with the wife before this time. (Apparently, according to an episode of Law & Order: Criminal Intent, if I should refer to Authrine as the wife again it maybe an indicator that we’re separated. That’s really funny. As in that kind of deduction, not being separated from Authrine. We’re not separated. We’re very much together.)

Where was I? Oh yeah, the people coming to collect their loot. Yeah, that’s fine, no problem with that, but then some other people turned up and asked what I perceived at the time in my recently awoken state to be irrelevant and stupid questions. My ire was not raised sufficiently to unleash the full force of Dryden sardonic wit and sarcasm in a dismissive manner to establish their gross inferiority at that time. I did however make it clear that there was no further room for conversation other than through monosyllaballic answers. (What do you mean monosyllaballic isn’t a word? What is it then?)

Taking the hint the perps in question did not stay long. It was as they were leaving and the ebay purchasers moved on that my wife chose that time to make her presence known – timing indeed worthy of her relatively new name – Dryden. (For if there is one thing I love with a passion is timing things in such a way that I avoid as much fuss as possible and just live in the tranquillity of the aftermath.) As she parked up, our next door neighbour was also at the door, perhaps her attention was taken with the moving carrying on. In any case, so there I was in the arched doorway where the next door neighbour could not see me, and there was the wife coming out of the car to see both her and me in our respective though next door archways.

Ever the recluse I took this as my hint to withdraw into the confines of my front room, whilst the wife engaged in conversation with our neighbour. On finally coming into the house my beloved partner of days shared the nature of the conversation and it acted as a spur to write this entry.

If you are unaware let me make it clear to you that followers of Jesus have challenges in various elements of the following. He often calls us to do things and be things that draw us out from ourselves into Himself. It differs from person to person. For me I’ve had tremendous challenges being a good neighbour. I have not overcome totally as yet, but I can see where over the last ten years I’ve made some progress in the area thanks to a lot of good influences like my wife, my church leader Hughie, my boss Danny and others.

Recently the local church was highlighting a series on Compassion 2009 and I had the privilege of going through some of the parables of Jesus and highlighting how compassion was at His source of the mission and ministry. I spent a month or two (one session a week, not every day of the month, although we probably could have done that) exploring the story of the Good Samaritan as found in Luke. Checking that whole episode in its immediate context and relating it to other significant things that God had been outlining since Cain knocked off his brother is highly revelatory for what the basics are in terms of loving your neighbour whether it is your enemy that’s suffering, or your next door neighbour.

Funnily enough at the same time I’d moved from one area of the city to another. You may recall I’d written copiously on the subject at the time. So as we settled down in the place where we are currently residing it was one of my desires to put this in action and show an active interest in the welfare of our neighbours. It was definitely a trip on the odd for me with my tendency to keep myself locked up and reading, writing or that kind of stuff. It’s not that I’m anti-social completely, as the friends I have can attest, I can be quite the conversationalist more than capable of banter. I am also very keen to develop relationships properly – not just based on projects and schemes that we’re doing together, but based on an interest in the person for who I discover them to be, and how I can likewise share my vulnerabilities with them. So the only barrier to me being a good neighbour has always been to take the initiative to engage with my neighbour.

In the six and a half years of married life to Authrine, it’s quite something to see how she naturally gravitates to being a good neighbour in building relationships with them and striking a knowing rapport as her retiring, reclusive husband hides himself behind another book. She has such an amiable spirit that on meeting her it’s difficult to take offense, unless you’re just ornery by nature.

So in terms of where we are at the moment I remember the key was down to doing something as simple as knocking on their front door to introduce myself. Talk about ice-breaker. (No we never played the game where you have to say three things about yourself with one of them being false and the other looking to see which one it is … although I might try that the next time we move … or not.) I believe the neighbours, for it is a married couple of whom I talk, were very happy to receive such a pleasant approach from their new neighbours.

I’m not going to unfold a tale of burgeoning love and devotion among us as neighbours, but we did get to know each other somewhat. Although it took us a remarkably long time to settle down, our neighbours were alright. One particular episode that stands out in the recollection of good times was one Sunday afternoon/evening. Authrine and I had stayed in a bit later than scheduled for whatever reason and we were just off to the COG facility to engage in another church session. Authrine’s car however had suffered from the dreaded dead battery. We looked to our neighbours for help and they came out and did their best with their vehicles to see if they could get the vehicle started. As it turned out they couldn’t, but it turned out to be a wonderful opportunity for the whole family to engage with the couple as we waited for the repair/recovery dudes to pop along.

I remember it as well because another neighbour from an area around the corner from where we lived also popped along and tried to help. What didn’t help the guy was that he was obviously more than familiar with alcohol and had a certain manner about him that others would have judged him on as a slovenly, suspicious, sinister, drunkard. I say that, because that’s usually my safe preference when encountering such characters. Thankfully on this occasion the compassion of Christ emerged in me to actually see this neighbour as another traveller on life’s journey who had a distinctive tale to tell. So with his mangy mutt I spent most of the rest of the evening getting to know him and share a little bit about love whilst engaging in his fascinating story and I’d like to think the brother felt all the better for a chance to have a decent conversation, and as well as that I thought he’d given me the protection of the area as he knew the crack of what went on. Funnily enough, our next door neighbour weren’t as forthcoming in being hospitable, but at least there was nothing offensive in their approach to relations.

That was just one of a number of quality episodes in getting to know our neighbours and getting on well with them. As a result I know a bit more about what it is to be a good neighbour both from the one who is being it as well one who is the recipient of it. It is good. It is godly. It is a good bridge to building relationships with those on our doorstep in the hope of shining the light of Christ through our characters so that they can have a view of it and possibly begin to share in the journey to Christ. I am aware that it costs, after all as any good relationship will testify, it is not about superficial matters on which good relations rest, it is on the costly acts of transparency, vulnerability, compassion and developing intimacy. That sort of stuff can get tricky from time to time, but ultimately when it’s lead by the source of all love, you cannot go wrong.

And now to live that further when we move on because as one prophet said that’s when good neighbours become good … friends. (Check this for more on the same lines.)

For His Name's Sake

Shalom

dmcd

He's My Brother

Today my only biological brother celebrated his 31^st birthday. David joins my father and I in not being that much bothered about birthday celebrations. Then again the whole point about these things is that you don’t have to be bothered when other people will be bothered for you. When it comes to being bothered about David Dryden I make a habit of it.

I trust my brother. I implicitly trust him in a way that I trust no other human being with the exception of my wife. I trust my brother like I trust no other man including my own dad. When everyone else gave up on me, my brother never gave up on me. When everyone else misunderstood me, my brother stuck around and even when it was a case of others not wanting to stick around, he stuck up for me like no other person has ever stuck up for me. The Bible suggests that faithful are the wounds of a friend and my brother has been faithful in challenging my beliefs, deflating my ego and on occasion giving me some hard home truths.

There was a point in which I hoped he and his beautiful wife Nicola would stay with me in the area. It is a point of how highly I regard him that I desperately wanted that to be the case. As it happened it worked out for the best that he chose to remain in Milton Keynes as it has meant I’ve had the opportunity to enjoy many great weekends down his yard and seeing what it is to enjoy the Sabbath rest, have wonderful warn relaxed fellowship and good food.

David as a brother has been brilliant this year in the understated ways as well. This year has been crucial for him to grow up and he’s risen well to the challenge. It is the greatest joy to know he’s made it being a father. The devotions he has and the undoubted love he has for his wife and his son are a quality trait to be admired by most men and I’m glad he’s not made some of the elemental early mistakes that I made in a similar position.

My brother remains a man of integrity committed to the truth at any cost especially on himself. He’s been willing to walk in places that few would dare to tread on the basis of his conviction of his beliefs. He’s taken that road alone at times, but he has shown incredible strength of character to not only persist in the area but also to gain strength and wisdom from it.

It is his character development over recent years that have been particularly pleasing to me. His skill and talent were never in question, but his priority of character over theses has allowed him to pay some costly prices in this regard. That bravery is something I hope will be a hallmark of his son and others. I pray that his circle of influence will indeed continued to be impressed by his character.

David faces some hard days ahead and I’m sure wouldn’t say no to prayers for him and his family, yet I remain confident in God that my brother will walk through these challenges with a great commitment to the truth and expression of it in his daily life. I know I continue to appreciate his advice and words of wisdom that remind me of what it’s all about. I know these will be entrenched even further because of his choosing his path of righteousness.

He’s a great friend to me and means far more than flesh and blood. I trust he will go from success to success in every aspect of his life. He ain’t heavy …

For His Name's Sake

Shalom

dmcd

Getting By With A Little Help ...

Well here we go, This is a bit unusual, but here I am blogging at this time of day and it made a whole heap of sense to do it.

I’ve noted on maybe a few occasions that my tendency is to be a bit of a loner. It is nothing to me to be in my own company carrying along merrily with whatever task I set my mind to – reading a book, watching a movie, writing a blog, studying me Bible, whatever. My own company is brilliant – solitude has not really been an issue to me.

Yet over the years the value of relationships, companionships, friendship, fellowship and all the other ships in the same company have come to the fore and I enjoy being able to call someone, email someone or even that quaint notion of sitting down and face to face sharing with someone. I love it. This has even contributed to the number of personal tributes I’ve made to special people in my life from my darling wife to my dear friend (you didn’t think I forgot that trip did you?) Mavia.

The growing realisation is as well that I am the product of other people. I have aspects of me that are unique and God-given and the like, but for the large part I’m a result of the impact of other people. The book that influences me is the mind of another person. The food that gives me satisfaction how mechanised the process is still the labour of love of another person. The television programmes and web-sites are obviously the product of another person. I am indeed not a rock or an island by myself It would be the height of being foolhardy to discount just how many people have made me who I am today.

So in reflecting on that I came across this familiar song and thought it appropriate once more the celebrate good friends and the blessing that God has given me in being a relational being to realise that I get by with a little help from my friends. There is of course a friend who sticks closer than a brother, so in that case I’m also indebted to the enormous help that has got me by from Jesus.

For His Name's Sake

Shalom

dmcd

Hughie Lawrence - How Deep Is Your Love?

There are some things that I’m really surprised about concerning this blog. One of them is that I’ve only mentioned Hughie Lawrence once before. I struggle to believe that in all that I’ve written in well over 500 posts I’ve only mentioned him once when he’s been fairly pivotal to the Christopher Dryden Story over the last 10 years at least. Not that he’d mind I’m sure. He’s not really one to draw attention to himself as in look to get people to think of him. He’s relatively self-deprecating in that sense (key word – relatively), but that shouldn’t stop me from writing about the guy.

Sure the last time I did write about the guy it was a fulsome blog of thanks for all the good that he has done for me, but he still has continued to be quite a force in my life. Indeed over the last year or so he has been the source of much of my personal issues. What has remained outstanding about this guy is that he really gets me thinking about that question the Bee Gees asked – How Deep Is Your Love?

The other day, Hughie paid me one of the highest compliments I’ve heard another human being give me – and that includes my wife (probably … oh hold on she’s reminding me who holds the purse strings, so I’ll retract that immediately). He mentioned that I’ve been one of the greatest blessings in his life. Now I’m not usually good with compliments anyway, but it took all the 18-year home training at dead-pan poses to maintain an unruffled outer visage at that. Inside, meanwhile, I was in turmoil as I’ve never really seen myself that way … at all.

Then I got thinking. You see Hughie isn’t a Machiavellian author of spin and manipulation, but he’s no slouch when it comes to saying something multi-layered either. So in a real sense I can see where he’s coming from, because from my perspective I can see where I’ve blessed him in developing a closer walk with Christ. We’ve been working particularly closely together for almost 10 years now and in that time I have continued to be a pain for one reason or another. Whether it was the level of immaturity and inconsistency in the first few years, or the inevitable challenges of the changes that come after married life in the middle years or the restless growing pain issues of recent years, I have stuck around to be a persistent thorn in his side. In all my errors he has on most occasions channelled the love of Christ in dealing with me and that’s definitely not been about the arm round the shoulder bit, but saying the right words or giving space where needed.

I know for sure that I’ve changed in that ten years and without exercising false humility I can recognise areas of growth. Despite being his underling and junior brother, I can say that I have likewise seen changes in him as a man, leader and brother. When I first came across him he was very much predisposed to being a closed book rarely willing to give up a point of view or concede a position he held. I definitely knew that he was unlikely to reveal much about himself. Yet especially recently perhaps over the last year or so, he has been more vulnerable and transparent with his church family. He has let people into his inner sanctum to some extent and opened up about the challenges and his need for prayer and help in general. That level of openness is immediately encouraging and sometimes I’ve felt he’s almost preached as if he’s about to die.

His commitment to the Kingdom and what he believes God is telling him has pushed him harder than ever before as he believes God for things that would make a lesser man withdraw with haste. He is still one of the most charismatic communicators I’ve seen in action and his failings only reinforce his openness to the leading of the Lord. His leadership qualities are evident in the achievements he has led others to bring about. He still manages to get people to do things they don’t want to do to help them discover what God has for them. He has faith that helps people move beyond their previous position to a closer one with God.

Things are changing between Hughie and I as they must as people get older and things change. Things are changing here in Stoke-on-Trent and we must change with them. That change, as I’m learning, does not mean that the love for each other recedes. It definitely does not mean that the level of respect diminishes. On the contrary as I look back at the privilege I’ve had in witnessing this man of God in action in good times and bad over the last 10 years I recognise what an honour it is to see God at work mightily in the life of His son. That respect, that admiration and that honour for a man is burnt deep into my psyche and wherever we go and whatever changes by the grace of God that connection will remain.

Today he celebrated another birthday and I’m sure he got what he needed for it. Of far greater importance is that reward that awaits him as he remains faithful to the call God has made on his life. I pray that God keeps him and continues to mould him to be a vessel of honour. I pray that God will allow him to be further refined to be an even more fruitful branch attached to the True Vine. I pray that his heart’s desires are realised as they merge with kingdom plans. He deserves so much for the level of sacrifice he’s given over the years. I remain humbled to know Hughie Lawrence – may he go from strength to strength as he follows the paths of righteousness and grows in the grace and knowledge of our Lord and Saviour.

For His Name's Sake

Shalom

dmcd

Food, Focus, Football and Changes

Quite a lot to put out tonight and it’s a job to keep it all in perspective, but I’ll give it me best shot.

First of all there is a saying that in terms of the meals of the day that it’s best to have breakfast like a king, lunch like a prince and dinner like a pauper. I’ve never really lived by that ethic at all always looking forward to dinner like a king, lunch like a prince and breakfast like the pauper’s apprentice. Still, today I enjoyed the benefits of such a lifestyle.

Not sure if I’ve told you, but my dearly beloved mother is currently with us here in Stoke-on-Trent. That means she cooks. Authrine has no problem with that at all and doesn’t see it as a slight to her cooking. In fact I get the impression she sees it as a weight off her domestic responsibilities. In any case the mother cooks and of late she has been feeding me as if I needed to be bolstered with the goodness that comes with heaps of food. Seriously two full plates of food are not unusual for meals whilst the rest of the family muddle through their single plate. She loves me, I guess. I’m not complaining.

This has a bearing, though, for Sunday breakfasts because such is the filling nature of those breakfasts that I seriously don’t have to think about eating again for the rest of the day. That was definitely the case yesterday when another one of her beauties had me almost out for the count for the rest of the day. It was bad enough that I had a real long relaxing soak in a bath, to come out of that into the kind of breakfast that I received; I was seriously of no use to anyone until I had a two hour nap!

Anyway, because of that I seriously didn’t need anything to eat for the rest of the day and we came back home from the party rather late as I may have mentioned. So this morning now, Mum wants to make the most of the food that’s been coming in so sets up a breakfast for me. Well you shouldn’t need me to tell you how big that breakfast was. And as a result again I did not require another meal for the rest of the day.

I got some chips from a chip shop and it was meant to be a large portion but it was fairly pathetically small in content for a large portion, but even that didn’t bother me as the morning’s shipment would see me through with that minimal top up.

Moral of the story – if you’re filled up properly in the day it should last you for the rest of the day. That’s not just about the importance of breakfast – that’s about the importance of feasting full of the Spirit to be able to motor through the day because you’ve been filled.

Also as a sub-plot moral – it’s good to have a generous, loving mother on your side and an equally kind and loving wife only too willing to allow the mother to get on with what she does best so that her son can keep on trucking through the day.

Believe or not, that’s not the main reason for blogging this evening.

I had the privilege of watching Liverpool vs. Aston Villa at my mate Matt’s house this evening. Last season we watched the equivalent fixture in a pub in Shelton (a district of Stoke-on-Trent for those who live outside the centre of the known universe). In that match Villa was soundly thrashed 5-0 by Liverpool.

On this occasion Villa deservedly walked away from Anfield with the three points for the first time in about eight years. They won 3-1 and it was no less than their performance merited.

Now you may recall that I’ve resolved to look at my approach to football in the light of looking to honour God in that pursuit, so it’s not about being emotionally distraught at the result of a football match or getting over analytical on what that means for events still to be decided over the next nine months. What it does provide is good entertainment for watching the match with a friend.

Young Matt, you see, is a Villa fan and although he’s relatively young in the Lord, he’s not young in the Villa and as an engrained fan it too everything in him not to gloat at the victory. Although that did not stop him celebrating at the key turning points in the match. It was amusing watching him endeavour to compose himself as we related further just to see if I was still alright and needed anything … like tissues. All good quality fun and a privilege as I said to just watch it with the brother at his crib.

I could go into analysis about why Liverpool lost the match, but there’s a principle in it that has bearings for far more significant issues. I link that, however, to the reading that I was doing as I walked from Matt’s house back to my own. As you may know I love reading and I especially enjoy reading whilst walking if I can manage to do that on a long journey from one place to another. Doing so increases the reading time – which is a good thing, and also drastically cuts down on any transport costs that may have been incurred had I sought a taxi or public transport.

So as I stated in a previous blog I’m reading McKinstry’s bio on Sir Alf Ramsey and it has reached the point where Ramsey has taken a small provincial club like Ipswich and got them promoted up through the Third to the Second to the First Division and now in their first season in the top flight they win the League Championship itself to the surprise of all the pundits. Such a remarkable achievement eventually gets him recognition from the FA who approaches him to become the next England manager back in 1962.

One of the provisos of accepting the post is that he completes the 1962/63 season with Ipswich. It is during that season that the Champions suffer dramatically and the principle to which I’m referring emerges. A critique of Ramsey is that he remains too loyal to the players and the system that won him the Championship. By now other clubs have sussed it out and are taking points off the team. The decline sets in so that the season after he leaves the club gets relegated.

So what is the principle in question? It is this – what gets you somewhere is not necessarily what will keep you somewhere. Different methods are required at different stages to maintain growth otherwise stagnancy sets in and worse still rather than progressing we regress.

McKinstry points out that Ramsey’s loyalty to players and systems would also be at the heart of his downfall as England manager. The link to the Liverpool match is that although Rafa adjusted tactics, he was slow to change them sufficiently sticking to a system that no longer met the need of the time. Such loyalty to such a system when you don’t really have the personnel for it can lead to results like the one tonight.

Likewise every day’s challenges have a specific tactic that will ensure success in that day. That particular tactic, however, is not applicable to the following day, or even the day after that. The overall objective remains – to grow – but the method in which that is done must be relevant to the circumstances.

We have to be sensitive to divine instructions to allow us to know how to approach every day, not by relying on yesterday’s methods alone, but seeing what wisdom there is for today through God’s Word. Otherwise we run the danger of not progressing, but stagnating and regressing.

Its application in my life is that I’m clear that I’m all about glorifying God in body with all I have in me. To do that, I need to focus on the author and finisher of my faith – Jesus Christ. In order to do that, however, I need to be filled by, led by and able to walk in the Spirit that rose JC from the grave. Getting all of that done is to be on the look-out for the daily bread God provides me every day in my YMCA work, in my family life, in my church interactions, in the books I read, football matches I watch, conversations I have, food I eat – especially at breakfast, etc.

Being responsive in this fashion allows me to know when my season is to bring forth fruit and then work in line with the season that I’m in.

Just wanted to share that with you.

For His Name's Sake

Shalom

dmcd